The 13th Amendment makes it illegal to buy people.

Apparently, it doesn't apply to congressmen.


View original post [self.Jokes]




Comments:

8 Dec 2017 04:44 - +3829
didn't you know? Politicians aren't people.
8 Dec 2017 04:44 - +394
Oh it is, it’s just who’s going to punish you. The congressmen?
8 Dec 2017 07:19 - +224
Well, they're often criminals. If they're convicted of a crime, the 13th Amendment doesn't bar it. Yes...I'm serious. Go read it.
8 Dec 2017 08:03 - +109
This isn't a joke, it belongs in /r/Showerthoughts
8 Dec 2017 08:18 - +44
The 13th amendment makes it illegal to buy people. "But politicians are exempt from laws"
8 Dec 2017 08:37 - +21
This is like one of those jokes you make at the water cooler and maybe you'll get a chuckle from Dave but he laughs at everything so you're not sure if it was a good one.
8 Dec 2017 06:45 - +19
Better watch out for Frankenstein.
8 Dec 2017 09:28 - +8
is that the same one that allows slavery within prisons?
8 Dec 2017 09:20 - +8
It also allows you to become a slave if convicted of a crime. >Neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, **except as a punishment for crime whereof the party shall have been duly convicted,** shall exist within the United States, or any place subject to their jurisdiction. This has led to mass incarceration in the US where prisoners toil away for pennies a day making products for stores like J C Penny. [Watch 13th on Netflix.](https://www.netflix.com/watch/80091741?trackId=13752289&tctx=0%2C0%2C)
8 Dec 2017 09:25 - +5
Ah, one of those jokes that isn't really funny at all but gets upvoted because people agree with the sentiment.
8 Dec 2017 09:14 - +5
I get that we all hate the net neutrality stuff and lobbyists in general, but this just isnt funny at all. I want to laugh again
8 Dec 2017 08:02 - +5
You can still rent them in states like Nevada, though.
8 Dec 2017 09:13 - +3
In hindsight, it seems obvious that the final conquest of the United States came about, not as a result of war and invasion, but simply because so many notable Americans were purchasable. History books, if any legitimate ones get written, will someday explain how those in leadership roles, both in and out of government, all had a price. Which, when you think about it, makes a heartbreaking kind of sense. From its inception, our national culture has been predicated on the ruthless pursuit of profit. Sure we all enjoy movies, books and TV shows that portray people putting principles ahead of personal gain. But it might be time to admit that in the real world, grandiose patriotism has always been a mask used to hide banal self-interest. Regardless, the sale is complete. Cash, not Kalashnikovs, sealed the deal. -- Chuck Lorre
8 Dec 2017 08:43 - +3
It's rent-to-own.
8 Dec 2017 09:10 - +2
Or prison industrial complex, or the wage economy where a majoroty percentage of the populations struggle to make livabke wage working 3 jobs. Or that holdiays are a luxury noone can afford. Or the debt everyone expected to get into just to be able to work a shitty job for low pay.
8 Dec 2017 09:32 - +2
"Makes it illegal for **Poor** people to buy people."* Once you've got the right amount of money or connections you're not subject to the law.
8 Dec 2017 10:38 - +2
Congressmen are not people.
8 Dec 2017 10:06 - +2
I'm working on a new formula that will "Make soylent green great again".
8 Dec 2017 10:34 - +2
See your problem is thinking congressman are people
8 Dec 2017 10:16 - +2
ITS OK TO SHOOT THEM MORTY! THEY’RE ROBOTS!
8 Dec 2017 06:49 - +2
So are corporate buy-outs illegal??
8 Dec 2017 06:04 - +2
Unless they're a prisoner...
8 Dec 2017 10:00 - +1
What about all the slaves I own?
8 Dec 2017 10:12 - +1
Looks like those clowns in Congress did it again. What a bunch of clowns.
8 Dec 2017 09:44 - +1
What about capitals in other countries With “just buy more guns “ as a backup
8 Dec 2017 10:26 - +1
People always say we live in a democracy when in reality it is a mostly democratic republic.
8 Dec 2017 10:03 - +1
You can't buy love, but you can rent it for two minutes at a time.
8 Dec 2017 10:31 - +1
Congressmen don’t live on a planet we like to call Earth.
8 Dec 2017 09:49 - +1
Or ajit pai
8 Dec 2017 10:36 - +1
"Looks like those clowns in congress did it again. What a bunch of clowns." - Some morning radio robot, probably
8 Dec 2017 10:00 - +1
hahah congressmen arent people
8 Dec 2017 10:44 - +1
That's why they're called Congresscritters.
8 Dec 2017 10:10 - +1
Thats not even a joke thats an accurate observation
8 Dec 2017 10:47 - +1
There goes my weekend.
8 Dec 2017 09:48 - +1
Buying Senators was legalized with the 17th Amendment.
8 Dec 2017 10:49 - +1
Senators exempt themselves from pretty much every single law that they make.
8 Dec 2017 09:50 - +1
Can I rent myself out? Asking for a friend.
8 Dec 2017 10:52 - +1
Lizard people don't count
8 Dec 2017 10:00 - +1
Goddamn that would be an interesting legal precedent if it did though.
8 Dec 2017 10:08 - +1
I️ thought the 13th amendment gave the White House the right to do anything they want....... wait a minute that’s what the 13th amendment is part of a document that makes sure the government isn’t able to do what they want . I️ don’t understand how they have the right to anal probe me
8 Dec 2017 10:02 - +1
I really want to translate (Turkish) and tweet this and it’s very likely to get hot considering the ongoing investigation in the USA (The guy that bribed Turkish officials, Reza Sarrab) But it is also as likely to get me in actual trouble. Sad cold truth :(
8 Dec 2017 09:43 - +1
Excuse me sir! Congressmen and women are only rented sir!
8 Dec 2017 10:05 - +1
They are pretty cheap too!
8 Dec 2017 08:39 - +1
You may be on to something for stopping lobbyists from owning Congress.
8 Dec 2017 10:09 - +1
Lolsob
8 Dec 2017 08:50 - +1
Well sure, it says nothing about long term rentals.
8 Dec 2017 10:12 - +1
you know when they say, its funny because its true. yeah, not this time
8 Dec 2017 09:05 - +1
Anyone here seen the 13th documentary?
8 Dec 2017 10:16 - +1
nukeboom.gif
8 Dec 2017 09:16 - +1
It took me a while but; 8/10
8 Dec 2017 10:29 - +1
https://www.stampstampede.org/shop/
8 Dec 2017 09:18 - +1
Or NBA team owners! ^^i'll ^^see ^^myself ^^out
8 Dec 2017 10:31 - +1
Just like every other amendment? I had a judge tell me to SHUTUP before i even started speaking. I started my sentence and before i could get the second word out he told me to SHUTUP. Violation of freedom of speech Violation of right to fair trial Boy i would tear his ass up if i had any higher power over him
8 Dec 2017 09:20 - +1
to be fair, it doesn't make it illegal to buy people, it just makes you have to find an excuse to buy them first.
8 Dec 2017 10:36 - +1
It's OK, because they never stay bought.
8 Dec 2017 09:20 - +1
...and I just ordered twenty two.
8 Dec 2017 10:46 - +1
Illegal to own. People are bought and sold every day.
8 Dec 2017 09:27 - +1
No, cause it only applies to people.
8 Dec 2017 10:48 - +1
r/AntiJokes
8 Dec 2017 09:32 - +1
Or corporations.
8 Dec 2017 10:51 - +1
You should see the streets of L.A at night.
8 Dec 2017 09:40 - +1
So buying stocks for corporations, people, is illegal?

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